Friday, June 29, 2012

Self-portrait

So I've been doing a bit of sketching lately, trying to sketch the foxes beside our house. On Friday, I visited the National Portrait Gallery with a friend, and there was an exibit on self-portraits. Lots of them were naked, and I wondered how one could be so vulnerable that they would paint themselves naked and then show other people. I decided that I would try making a self-portrait (not naked, so don't panic!) as a way of trying to see myself in a different light. Trying to see myself as other people may see me, rather than through the filter of self-doubt and injury and criticism that I use to view myself.

Here is my first attempt.




It looks quite pretty. Now I can't tell if I'm prettier than I think I am, or if I actually have a healthier self-esteem than I admit to. Why else would you draw yourself pretty if you didn't actually think you were - is it because deep down I do think I am pretty, or because I was just faithfully drawing what I saw in the mirror?

The next task is to buy a mirror bigger than 15cms in diameter to make the task easier.
(Interestingly, because it's a mirror, it is a mirror image of me. It is what I see of myself when I look in the mirror. My husband finds the picture odd, because it's not what he sees when he looks at me - I've been reversed! Maybe my next sketch should be based on a picture so that I can see what I really look like!)

4 comments:

  1. Wow, it's gorgeous! I wish I could draw!

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    1. Thanks Jen :) I always thought I couldn't draw either! I think it was just because I didn't have the patience to go gently and slowly, or the belief that I could do it. I've done about 8 really good sketches over the years, and 50 terrible ones, so maybe I just need to practice more :D

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  2. Hey Michelle, just came across your blog! :) How's England going??
    In regards to your self-portrait, I totally understand the questions you ask about yourself and the portrait and self-esteem!
    The image is beautiful, and you are beautiful. The more I look at it, the more I see likenesses between your real face and your perceived face. It's not a photo-likeness, but there are parts that have been captured well. That's an amazing effort at a self-portrait! How many times did you try before you got this one?
    God bless :)

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  3. Hey Hann, Thanks for such a lovely comment :) The sketch I did in an afternoon - which probably explains why I haven't completely captured the likeness - I just wanted to get it finished! So impatient....
    Maybe I need to have a go at sketching the foxes again, too. I wish I could capture their playfulness - they always end up looking too mean when I try to draw them!

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